Random Round-Up

So it turns out that Dysons are expensive. REALLY expensive. Sorry Conrad! Maybe next year. (Or maybe we should just get hardwood floors!)

My children were monsters for two straight days apparently because they were tired. That is the conclusion we've come to this evening, because after going to bed last night at 7:55 PM and both sleeping almost 12 straight hours without making a peep, they were in great form today. Evidently they need more sleep. And it only took Conrad and I two days of pure misery to figure it out. Geniuses, the both of us.

Tomorrow is Sunshine's last day of preschool until the Fall. She is very excited because there will be a party, which we are all invited to attend. And of course, we will be there, because this is her very first last day of school party! Milestones--they come in many forms. However, I remembered this evening as I put her to bed that we are supposed to bring a "sweet snack" for the gala event. And I am too tired right now to do anything except type. And so tomorrow, after breakfast, we are baking cookies. Sweet.

Deuteronomy has now used the potty three times in three days. I think we are officially potty training, which is both good and bad. In no more than 10 weeks we are going to have another child in diapers. If Deuteronomy can fly through this potty training thing, we are in good shape and will have only one child in diapers. However, I think that might be slightly overestimating the abilities of a 19-month old boy. I am going to assume that potty training is going to be more like a year-long process. In which case, I would love it if he'd just hold off on starting, because we are going to be very busy very soon. Too bad I don't get to pick.

I am 30 weeks pregnant. Baby #3 is going to arrive, at the latest, in 10 weeks (the doctors will not let me go past my due date because of my history of having such big babies). I have...um...absolutely NOTHING ready. Exactly, precisely nothing. Not a onesie washed (I don't even know where all the baby boy clothes are packed away), not a diaper bought, not a car seat cleaned. NOTHING. Which is beginning to stress me out, because we have AT MOST 10 weeks left and there is no guarantee we have that long. We need to get on the ball.

I have had very few comments on my posts lately...but I know people are reading, cause I have been obsessively checking my sitemeter to make sure. If you, um, you know, are here anyway, go ahead and say hi. I'd love to hear from you!

Why Conrad Rocks, Part II

We were watching baseball last night when a commercial for the new Dyson Ball vacuum came on the television.

Conrad watched intently, impressed, and turned to me and said slyly, "Fathers Day is coming up!".

I scoffed, and asked would he REALLY want a vacuum for Fathers Day.

He turned to me, dead serious. "Baby. Its not just a vacuum. Its the gift of clean carpets."

And then I laughed so hard I almost wet my pants.

He knows the way to my heart. And seriously, the man might be getting a vacuum for Fathers Day.

Today I Am Wearing Earplugs

Do you know how many times I heard the word "Mommy" yesterday?

Approximately 4 billion.

My kids were CRA-ZA-ZY all day.

Of course it was raining, so we couldn't go outside to play. Of course Sunshine didn't have preschool, so there was nothing to break up our afternoon. Of course I had work to do, so the only place Deuteronomy wanted to sit was directly on my lap with his hands in my face.

Normally they play well together. Yesterday they were picking at each other, poking, pinching, hitting.

And OH. MY. GOD. THE. WHINING.

Sunshine has suddenly started whining about everything. Everything. EVERYTHING.

If Deuteronomy so much as looked at her funny, she tattled in a whiny voice that he was bothering her. I cannot count how many times I had to ask her to please say something without whining. And she has started to speak to him in this awful, commanding, condescending manner. I can only assume that is how I sound to her when I reprimand her, and it makes me cringe.

I was tired, having spent much of the previous night awake because Baby #3 was playing soccer in my belly. They were wired, and antsy, and abnormally in my face and in each other's faces. Not a good combination.

I tried to be patient. I busted out art projects (Look kids, fingerpaint! Now STOP TALKING!!!). I succumbed to the lure of the TV and put on Little Einsteins. Two episodes.

And still, when Conrad walked in the door, my nerves were shot. I had spent so much time controlling my urge to just scream at them to STOP IT ALREADY, I was completely on edge. He asked what was wrong, and I almost didn't have the words to describe it...they hadn't been BAD really in any specific way. They had just been overwhelmingly overwhelming.

I really, really hope today is better than yesterday. Because if its not, tomorrow I am just staying in bed.

Who Let The Dogs Out

When we pulled up in the driveway this afternoon after picking up Sunshine at preschool, Deuteronomy and I walked through the door in the garage into the house. Sunshine ran to the front door and rang the doorbell, and we ran over to let her in, pretending to be surprised to see her at the door.

As we let her in, the neighbor's dog, a fox terrier whose name I don't know, came running up to our front stoop. And followed Sunshine right into my house.

And all hell broke loose.

Sunshine and Deutetonomy started screaming, and Deuteronomy tried to scale my legs. I was standing there with a handful of mail and catalogs, trying unsuccesfully to block the dog from coming in. The mail went flying, and the dog came barreling into the foyer, arriving face-to-face with our cat.

The cat turned and took off, and the dog followed in hot pursuit. I chased after them, screeching at the dog to get out. Halfway across my living room, my cat decided she'd had enough. She turned around, hissed like an angry tiger, and swatted the dog across the nose. He immediately cowered, giving me enough time to break them up. Unfortunately the dog wan't wearing a collar for me to grab, so instead I chased it back toward the front door while simultaneously trying to block the cat from launching a fresh attack.

Meanwhile, Sunshine had run halfway up the stairs and was screaming her bloody head off, while Deuteronomy sort of froze in the foyer, running in place on top of the pile of mail and shouting "Mama UP!" over and over.

I chased the dog out the door, scooped up Deuteronomy, and shouted to Sunshine that I would be right back. I closed the door behind me and led the leaping dog across the yard to my neighbor's house. As we walked, Deuteronomy tried to climb up my ribcage and presumably sit on top of my head to get as far from the jumping, yipping dog as he possibly could.

Just as we got to my neighbor's front steps, Sunshine came tearing out of the house and completely captured the dog's attention. As he went running back toward her, she stopped short and stood at the end of the walkway like a statue, trying to compact her body into the smallest space possible and wailing as the dog hopped around her, wanting to play.

Fortunately, my neighbor opened the door just then and the dog came dashing back before Sunshine imploded with fear. Apologizing profusely, my neighbor explained that the dog had gotten out that morning as well and they couldn't figure out how it was escaping. I assured her there was no problem, and led the kids back home.

As I scooped the scattered mail up off the floor of the foyer, I burst out laughing at the image we must have been--a profoundly pregnant lady and two screaming toddlers playing tag between a hissing cat and a yapping dog.

If I could only have gotten it on video, we'd be $10,000 richer for sure.

Free Yogurt

I just learned that Stonyfield Farm, whose yogurt my kids (and I) love, is offering a free one-month supply of their new YoMommy yogurt to the first 25 Moms who upload a video to their new "Moms on Motherhood" site.

In the video, moms are asked to describe what they do to help their kids grow up healthy and happy.

Here is the link:
http://www.yobabyyogurt.com/coverbabycontest/mommymantra.cfm

Race for the Cure

I will be walking with the DC Metro Moms in the Susan G. Komen National Race for the Cure on June 7th in Washington DC.

Please check out my post over at the DC Metro Moms blog!

And if you are interested in donating to a worthy cause, feel free to follow the link on the right sidebar to my Race for the Cure personal webpage. Your support will be greatly appreciated!

Joy in the Unusual

For parents, joy is often found where those who do not have children may not see it:

Three straight hours of sleep in the first week of a newborn's life.

A newfound ability to clap, roll over, or sit up.

Making it through dinner in a restaurant without anyone crying or throwing silverware on the floor.

These are things that parents do not take for granted, but rather can rejoice in.

Tonight, I experienced complete and total joy and excitement over an event very few would call positive. And here is where the lofty tone of this post takes a nosedive: I was peed on by my 19-month old son.

As he sat on the potty and peed for the very first time.

For quite a while, Deuteronomy has been expressing interest in the potty. Recently, he's been periodically asking "Poop potty?" over and over until we bring him into the bathroom and sit him on the potty. He sits for 30 seconds, then reaches for the toilet paper, exclaiming "Done!". Then he hops off the potty, crumples up the toilet paper and throws it in, and flushes. And then he is very proud.

Conrad and I have attempted to be patient and not to discourage him in his curiousity, but sometimes its frustrating to take the time to sit with him there, knowing full well he will only actually stay on the toilet for 30 seconds.

Tonight, as I was putting the kids to bed, he stood up in his crib, again asking "Poop potty?". I swallowed my initial annoyance and brought him into the bathroom with Sunshine trailing behind us and plopped him on the pot.

And ten seconds later, he peed. Since he has no concept of or ability to aim, half of it went into the potty and the other half landed on my leg sitting on the bathroom floor.

Sunshine and I immediately began to shriek--but with total joy. She grabbed him and hugged him while he still sat there, obviously pleased with himself. We cheered and clapped and helped him down. And then I cleaned up the floor, the toilet, and all of our hands (and my leg).

He went to bed beaming, as Sunshine and I repeated our praises and kissed him goodnight.

Finding joy in the unusual...its what parenting is all about.